Yesterdays Drive Home

[wuffnuff]

Yesterdays Drive Home

While on vacation I found out that my company performed a 20% reduction in staffing. Currently my job is safe and I am thankful for it.

Returning to work yesterday I found out that in addition to my company halting 401k matching and the layoffs, there will be no merit increases or bonuses this year and possibly next.

This originally irked me, but then I drove home.

Through a series roads closed by construction or car accidents I ended up taking a route I don't normally. While waiting at an intersection for the light to turn, there was a homeless guy with a sign. He wasn't like some of the people you see where you kinda question if they were homeless or just scamming. He looked homeless, like the few posssesions he had with him were the only ones in the world. He was jovial. Not in the crazy I am a tad touched kinda way, just the type that says happy or at least happy at that moment.

I gave him a few dollars before the light turned; he thanked me and continued to smile as I drove away. I realized that he had so much less than I, yet could still smile. It is easy to be down in these economic times, things are rough. There is still a roof over our heads though, food on the table and much to be thankful for. Yeah I may not get a raise, but I still have a job and a wonderful husband.

It only took a drive home and a moment to learn a lesson.

Keep heart, be thankful and help when you can.

 

[WildBerry]

Re: Yesterdays Drive Home

A fine story, well worth the time it took you to tell it.

 

[Garbad_the_Weak]

Re: Yesterdays Drive Home

Bravo!

agasdfasdfasdf

 

[Spinns]

Re: Yesterdays Drive Home

Thanks for sharing!

 

[BobCox2]

Re: Yesterdays Drive Home

I heard all that stuff in the first part of the post 6 months ago and I must say My companies getting value - those left are working hard.

I seem to meet a more downtrodden class of homeless as well, It's nice to hear your story.

 

[stillman]

Re: Yesterdays Drive Home

It was a nice gesture, however I have a much darker take on it...
[This is all just my opinion based on manipulative behavior I've experienced by living in a city for 7 years. Take it with a grain of salt]

He was smiling because he actually believes the money you gave him was some kind of great win. You are the big sucker and he is the big winner. His tactics worked marvelously. Some beggers use the cardboard signs with charcoal writtings, even though white paper is easier to get and easier for passersby to read. They choose the cardboard to make us use linkages in our minds, like maybe he lives in a cardboard box, the charcoal is some primitive writing tool which is all he has, etc. Although in this case idk if there was cardboard, I'm sure his posessions were being flaunted and even rendered to look more dirty, scavenged and sad looking.

He got free money. But was it really free? How many callories is he burning walking around in the cold looking for suckers? Is he really winning anything?
It's hard to tell which is sadder: his situation which he actually works toward, his attitude that he is making net gains, or his view of you as nothing but a resource to be exploited. Have you just helped a sociopath? We'll never know, but maybe (imo) your money would have better helped a hospital charity or the like?

I have a story of my own I'd like to share now, which is very similar and happened just yesterday...

A man bumbles down the street as I leave my appartment and asks if I know how to get to Sackville. He complains that no one else seems to know. Of course, everyone here knows how to get to Sackville; they just don't want to waste time explaining it because they have alarm bells telling them that this guy looks like he's not going to be walking 2.5 hours to Sackville in the rain.

So I tell him to wait as I go back to my appartment and get my map. I take him into the porch of the appartment complex so we don't get rained on. I show him the route, which is rather complex. I have to flip the big map over, show him the zig zag route, and explain which bridge to cross. Even though he claims not to be from Halifax, he seems to master the route too easily and assures me that he can get there by taking a certain bus. Of course, the map fetching and dirrections was all just a waste of my time. We all know what this is meant to lead up to. Bus fare.

So he asks for a dollar for the bus fare. I tell him that the bus costs 2 dollars so giving him a dollar wouldn't do anything helpful. He later asks for 3 dollars. I decide to dilly dally just to see what this guy is willing to do for a buck or two. I spend about 10 minutes making sure he knows the way to Sackville. Funny thing, he seems more intent on getting the bus fare even though he has no idea where to go.

In the end, I tell him he can have the map or the 2 dollars. He chose the 2 dollars. Is helping a pathological liar wrong? Probably. But maybe I stopped him from asking about 10 random people for dirrections to some far away destination he never intends on seeing. The important part is I really went out of my way to help him, and of course, he is just some manipulator out to scam money with stupid lies.

Idk, maybe I'm cruel, but I'm really tired of these manipulating bastards and their petty schemes of making themselves look vulnerable. Then, they use this in some elaborate con which they think is some great successful masterpiece of their creation. Everyone knows they are liars. I think subconcously we just help them out to learn something about them, like their tactics and what to look beware of.

 

[Garbad_the_Weak]

Re: Yesterdays Drive Home

No one begs if they have other options. I can promise you that despite the urban legends, beggars are not wealthy.

 

[Pierre]

Re: Yesterdays Drive Home

Idk, maybe I'm cruel, but I'm really tired of these manipulating bastards and their petty schemes of making themselves look vulnerable. Then, they use this in some elaborate con which they think is some great successful masterpiece of their creation. Everyone knows they are liars. I think subconcously we just help them out to learn something about them, like their tactics and what to look beware of.

I'm sorry, but what? How does a homeless person even have to try and make themself look vulnerable? I really dislike the way you generalise homeless people. Even if homeless people act like an ***, they have the right to. It's not like they have anything else. Besides, for every homeless *** i've met, i've met atleast one decent homeless person.

So we can say bastard and not ***? Figures.

 

[wuffnuff]

Re: Yesterdays Drive Home

It was a nice gesture, however I have a much darker take on it...

He was smiling because he actually believes the money you gave him was some kind of great win. You are the big sucker and he is the big winner. His tactics worked marvelously. Some beggers use the cardboard signs with charcoal writtings, even though white paper is easier to get and easier for passersby to read. They choose the cardboard to make us use linkages in our minds, like maybe he lives in a cardboard box, the charcoal is some primitive writing tool which is all he has, etc. Although in this case idk if there was cardboard, I'm sure his posessions were being flaunted and even rendered to look more dirty, scavenged and sad looking.

He got free money. But was it really free? How many callories is he burning walking around in the cold looking for suckers? Is he really winning anything?
It's hard to tell which is sadder: his situation which he actually works toward, his attitude that he is making net gains, or his view of you as nothing but a resource to be exploited. Have you just helped a sociopath? We'll never know, but maybe (imo) your money would have better helped a hospital charity or the like?

I agree that there are scammers out there, generally I am pretty good at picking though them. If I miss one here and there, so what? At least some people were helped a little bit. Really, what it cost me? The bottles of soda I missed out on is nothing compared to someone having a chance to eat.

Charities are find and dandy but there are a ton of people that don't get helped or have to wait and at that moment I could help then and there.

There have been situations were I have been burned by helping people, you know that though? I don't regret it one bit because I did the right thing, I extended a hand up to someone was down instead of kicking them.

 

[stillman]

Re: Yesterdays Drive Home

Yeah, sorry for bringing down the good mood. I just feel that I keep encountering the same sort of person in each begger. I'm sure there are some people who really are unfortunate enough to be stuck somewhere on the street feeling compelled to beg.

I find, however, that many of them really do this because they so desire. Now, of course, you would say why would they want that for themselves? The answers are complex, but let me explain...

Some people want to end up in a hospital, and they love beign sick. Why? Because they are being seen by experts, they get their food brought to them, their bed gets made for them, they recieve care and sympathy they wouldn't otherwise get outside the hospital. Hence, some people work hard at getting sick to enjoy these benefits. There are similar benefits to homelessness. You never have to answer to your boss, you never have to wake up at certain times in the morning, you don't have to answer to anyone, you have free time on your hands. I'm sure this all sounds very strange to some of you, but some people really are like this.

Pierre,

I call some of them names because they really are manipulating the innocent people going by and they do this for a living. Imo, they DO have options, they DO have choices. Many of them may have family members who would take them in for a brief period, help them out, clean them up, and let them use the house as base to apply for jobs right away. But of course, there are house rules. When you stay in a relative's house, you must pull your weight and obey the owner's rules. Homeless people simply refuse to obey these rules.

They'd rather roam the streets and enjoy their freedom. They have problems with authority which also keeps them from applying for jobs. The labor jobs are out there. Many many labourers are needed. In Halifax, I was able to get a labour job for the summer in just hours after trying. I didn't need a presentable suit or anything. All you have to do is conform, show up, make a commitment and stick to it. Anyone can do this. I truely believe homeless people are simply chosing not to.

 

[Dondrei]

Re: Yesterdays Drive Home

I'm in a similar position but minus heartwarming stories about the homeless. So I'm still pissed off about my raise.