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What would you die for?

Today during my daily train trip i thught about cowardness and what a selfish coward i actually am.
Im afraid of almost everything, though i dont show it to people and dont admit it.
Most of all im afraid to die. And then i though what in the earth would i die for?
Would i die to save my mother? My girlfriend? My whole family? My country?
Its painfull to admit to myself that probably i wouldnt give my life for anything.
I think i would shoot at people. And once i have time to justify my actions i would torture people.
Where would i stop?
Would i torture children? Massacre hundreds of innocent people?
At first thought i think hell no, there is a line which i wouldnt cross. But would i really not?
I hope there is enough courage in me to sacrifice my life but i fear there is not.
How do you feel?
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