Relationship Question (fixed)

TL:DR version:

  • Stormshield; Forget about 163FCR altogether

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    3

Cannon Fodder

Diabloii.Net Member
I'm not sure if you don't understand the acronym RL or if you just don't know what a Real Life conversation consists of.




kidding :hide:
 

Quietus

Diabloii.Net Member
Omikron said:
maybe a woman's mind can just simply turn off those emotions that existed before but a guy is much different, when you lose the relationship there is no point of being left with anything less

remain friends with memories? why so you can be pissed off everyday at what you can never have again ?
Why would I be pissed off about it? If anything, I would say that in my experience, the women I've dated tend to have a much more difficult time turning off those emotions than I do. I have a pretty effective general philosophy - I accept everything I experience equally. If it's good, that's great, and I enjoy it. If it's bad, like a breakup, I accept that and move on. Learn what I can, of course, but move on.



Module88 said:
If you understood that he said, "He said men will never be just friends with women they want to ****," you wouldn't have said, "I take offense to that. I consider a number of women among my friends who I don't want to ****."

Unless you lied to us and really DO want to **** them, that is. And of course, if you're "just friends" still after that, then you might be on to something.

Or perhaps I wasn't as clear as I should have been. I assumed that my statement would be taken a particular way; It wasn't. My mistake. I'll be far more clear about things next time, if I can.

And no, I really don't want to **** them. I suppose it does help that there usually isn't much downtime between my relationships. A month after the divorce between me and my ex was decided, I had a girlfriend. I dumped said girlfriend recently, as things weren't working out romantically between her and I, and there is another woman that I have interest in - one that's much closer, which means weekend visits are possible. She is hopefully coming up this Sunday to accompany me to the "everything to do with sex show" going on at the CNE. Maybe that makes me seem bad, that I don't have much time between relationships... but that ties back to the above philosophy. I learned what I could from the other relationships, and moved on.
 

Moosashi

Diabloii.Net Member
The trick to it is you have to turn the feelings off...
Neat trick. Teach me? Where's the switch?

If you can turn your feelings out like a light, they probably weren't all that strong to begin with. If you broke up with someone for whom you didn't have strong feelings, then sure, you might feel you could be friends. In the unlikely event that they felt the same way, it might even work out. But chances are, if you do maintain a friendship, it's because they are holding out a shred of hope that they can win you back. That thought never really occurs to you because you're "just friends", but believe me, that's what they are thinking.

The dumpee can never be just a friend. If the relationship was real, then the severence just hurt too much. The pain of that rejection coupled with the attraction the poor soul undoubtedly still feels makes a true friendship impossible. Dumpers like to think they are friends with their exes, but really, they just can't distinguish lovesick fawning from genuine platonic affection.



 

Quietus

Diabloii.Net Member
Neat trick. Teach me? Where's the switch?

If you can turn your feelings out like a light, they probably weren't all that strong to begin with. If you broke up with someone for whom you didn't have strong feelings, then sure, you might feel you could be friends. In the unlikely event that they felt the same way, it might even work out. But chances are, if you do maintain a friendship, it's because they are holding out a shred of hope that they can win you back. That thought never really occurs to you because you're "just friends", but believe me, that's what they are thinking.

The dumpee can never be just a friend. If the relationship was real, then the severence just hurt too much. The pain of that rejection coupled with the attraction the poor soul undoubtedly still feels makes a true friendship impossible. Dumpers like to think they are friends with their exes, but really, they just can't distinguish lovesick fawning from genuine platonic affection.


Or maybe, just maybe, both people are capable of being adults about the situation they've unfortunately found themselves in. Or maybe the relationship wasn't working out for either person, and one just got to dumping the other first. There's numerous possibilities that aren't covered by your statements.



 
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