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ordering a pizza in the future

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by Sergeant, Mar 31, 2004.

  1. Sergeant

    Sergeant IncGamers Member

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    ordering a pizza in the future

    This would definitely be a sign of the apocalypse:


    Operator: "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national ID number?"

    Customer: "Hi, I'd like to place an order."

    Operator: "May I have your NIDN first, sir?"

    Customer: "My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's 6102049998-45-54610."

    Operator: "Thank you, Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland Drive, and the phone number's 494-2366. Your office number over at Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302, and your cell number's 266-2566. Which number are you calling from, sir?"

    Customer: "Huh? I'm at home. Where d'ya get all this information?"

    Operator: "We're wired into the system, sir."

    Customer: (Sighs) "Oh, well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat Special pizzas."

    Operator: "I don't think that's a good idea, sir."

    Customer: "Whaddya mean?"

    Operator: "Sir, your medical records indicate that you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. Your National Health Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice."

    Customer: "Damn. What do you recommend, then?"

    Operator: "You might try our low-fat Soybean Pizza. I'm sure you'll like it."

    Customer: "What makes you think I'd like something like that?"

    Operator: "Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your local library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion."

    Customer: "All right, all right . Give me two family-sized ones, then."

    Operator: "That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four kids,
    sir. Your total is $49.99."


    Customer: "Lemme give you my credit card number."

    Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash. Your credit card balance is over its limit."

    Customer: "I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your driver
    gets here."

    Operator: "That won't work either, sir. Your checking account's overdrawn."

    Customer: "Never mind. Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready. How long will it take?"

    Operator: "We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 minutes, sir. If you're in a hurry you might want to pick 'em up while you're out getting the cash, but carrying pizzas on a motorcycle can be a little awkward."

    Customer: "How the hell do you know I'm riding a bike?"

    Operator: "It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your car got repo'ed. But your Harley's paid up."

    Customer: "@#%/[email protected]&?#!!1!"

    Operator: "I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got a July 2006 conviction for cussing out a cop."

    Customer: (Speechless)

    Operator: "Will there be anything else, sir?"

    Customer: "Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2 liter of Coke".

    Operator: "I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us from offering free soda to diabetics."

    *CLICK*
     
  2. Chief JB

    Chief JB IncGamers Member

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    Heh, something like that would be just plain crazy. I think pizza hut is too busy worrying for this guy instead of selling their pizza.
     
  3. PloX

    PloX IncGamers Member

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    If ordering a pizza went like that... i'd never order a pizza..
    quite simply put. :surprise:
     
  4. toader

    toader Banned

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    I dunno if Sarge wrote that or copied it, but I think the author would be implying that this might be (dramatically) the way ALL things will be one day in the future, not just da pizza.
     
  5. Sergeant

    Sergeant IncGamers Member

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    Copied from an e-mail. Basically it's a satire of how complicated things might be in the future... Satiring "information overload", the availability of too much information.

    Personally, if I want a pizza delivered, I don't call anymore, I order it online, much easier, no misunderstandings and coupons are available automatically.
     
  6. Killfrenzy

    Killfrenzy IncGamers Member

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    it reminds me of an old episode of sliders when they were on a world where 95% of the population attended law school. one guy tries to order some fries and a coke and the guy says "ill need to see your carbonated beverage release form, and a doctors note stating that your cholesterol is under 200"
     
  7. Yaboosh

    Yaboosh IncGamers Member

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    You took that that email thinks things will get too complicated? The availability of too much information is an invasion of privacy, not a destruction of simplicity.
     
  8. Sergeant

    Sergeant IncGamers Member

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    It can't be both?
     
  9. Yaboosh

    Yaboosh IncGamers Member

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    Of course not. It is either one or the other. Just like you are either white or black, no others. Hispanics are black, the French are black, Irish are white. Like that, see?

    (this is me backing away slowly from the thread)
     
  10. toader

    toader Banned

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    Quote Worthy
     

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