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How to pick up at...

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by TheAmoeba, Mar 21, 2005.

  1. TheAmoeba

    TheAmoeba IncGamers Member

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    How to pick up at...

    Here's the thread idea...let's make a "guide" for those of us that are just getting back to the dating thing can use to talk to that someone who caught out eyes.

    I'll start first...how does one go about pciking up a girl at a club? Specifically, let's say the girl is dancing with a couple of her girl friends. The music is too loud to go up to her and ask if she wants a drink, ect. Of course, to make it a little more interesting, let's say you're a typical guy and can't dance too well and aren't confident enough to go up to her and start dancing (yes, getting over this confidence thing is the first step, but let's say instead that it's not your style to do that or something :)
     
  2. DrunkPotHead

    DrunkPotHead IncGamers Member

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  3. Matt

    Matt IncGamers Site Pal

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    Give her a wet willy.

    If not that, I'd probably wait for her to take a break for a drink or something, then approach her.

    -Matt
     
  4. DrunkCajun

    DrunkCajun Banned

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    We had some very lengthy posts that talked about how to go about picking up a girl buried on a 6th or 7th page of some thread a month or two ago--when I get a chance tomorrow some time I'll dig and see if I can't find it and link it.
     
  5. Steve_Kow

    Steve_Kow Banned

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    Search for threads created by me, the one titled "Honestly dudes, I don't mean to brag but I just shagged the hottest girl ever!"

    Towards the end Drunky and Cougar talk about their techniques, or you could just use mine. ;)
     
  6. onionfarm

    onionfarm IncGamers Member

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    I suggest a taser, just be fast enough to catch her because it's not as fun with damaged gods.
     
  7. GIR

    GIR Banned

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    It is if she's damaged intentionally...
     
  8. corax

    corax IncGamers Member

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    selective quoting at its finest.


    always remember proper lifting techniques
     
  9. MithrandirX

    MithrandirX IncGamers Member

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    Just knock her on the head with your club and drag her off to the cave by her hair.

    Oh wait, you mean a nightclub.. nevermind.

    EDIT: have you thought of kidnapping her and keeping her locked up in a high tower in your castle.. that usually works too.
     
  10. Namyeknom

    Namyeknom IncGamers Member

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    Right, mixing everything I know from experience, animal behaviour, and those god damn voices in my head:

    Step 1 - Claim your area. Flirting is basically a pre-mating ritual from monkey times, and assuming you not model material (your reading this...), you need some territory to play with. Make sure its not to close to the edge of the room, but not the busiest part of the club either, and insure theres virtually continous line of sight between you and her. Don't leave this area for too long, as this will be the key to your success. This territorial behaviour appeals to our hardwired animal instincts. Also if you believe in yourself that this area is 'yours', then your confidence will be boosted no end.

    Step 2 - Without looking to obsessed or stalker like, initiate eye contact. Apparently we flirt more with our eyes than any other part of the body (put it away!). This stage is helped if you actually have friends with your (2 would be an ideal number). You don't end up looking like Stalky Stalkerson if your with other people. It helps if theres something to look at behind her (the bar, DJ or whatever), as you can then scan the area, and return you gaze to her a regular intervals.

    ***OK, here is where you can pull out without any loss of face. You should be able to pick up the vibes already, she should be returning eye contact if she's interested, and may have altered her direction so she's more facing you. If the signs are her and her friends giggling and looking at you, then I suggest a hasty withdrawl, regroup and start another mission.***

    Step 3 - Make several fly-by (ie. walk past her), closing the distance each time. Hopefully it should be reasonably crowded and you'll have a good excuse for getting pretty close. Maintain eye contact as you approach and pass, but don't look back. Full on body scans are acceptable now, but don't be too pervy.

    Step 4 - Heres the deal breaker. Again another walk past, but this time your going to say something to her. Make sure she's seen you approach before hand, you shouting in her unwary ear ain't going to impress. Just a single sentence will do, compliment an item of clothing ('Nice boots...' is a personal favourite, although please make sure she is wearing some before you say it.) or her hair or anything. As long as you put a sexy spin on it, it'll be fine. Continue walking past, this time give her a quick look back in a sort of knowing, you've fallen into my web kind of way (just don't fall over anything while doing this, its embarassing and it hurts).

    Step 5 - If all is going to plan, she should do the rest. Continue walking by, and if you a bit of wordsmith, try saying something more. Eventually she'll sink her claws in if she's interested. Aim for a middle line between caution and full-on-ness. You don't want here thinking your a sex pest, but you want to keep her interested. If she wants to dance, do your best to avoid it without saying no directly, but if you must try and time it with something reasonably slow. Anything that requires any co-ordination and your ruined, where as most people can manage a slow number. Otherwise do what comes naturally, go with the vibe, and remember to have fun.

    If this doesn't work, then I'd go for the afformentioned taser (thanks onionfarm), just make sure you've got a car running out the front first...
     
  11. Freet

    Freet IncGamers Member

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    Tell her your seven kids need a new mommy and you need someone to pop that pimple on your back.

    The mothering instinct will kick in and she will be all over you.
     
  12. bc10068

    bc10068 IncGamers Member

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    it's no fun if someone tells you
     
  13. GIR

    GIR Banned

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    For real. How are we supposed to get a giggle out of your failure post if we tell you how to do it right the first time?
     
  14. Anakha1

    Anakha1 Banned

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    "I have a prehensile penis and retractable testicles."

    Works every time.
     
  15. Pierrot le Fou

    Pierrot le Fou IncGamers Member

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    I would take Nietzsche's advice.

    Granted he was talking about the absence of absolute truth and the importance of being human rather than picking up women, but the same can apply to your attempts towards the fairer sex.

    There are two types of people in life and in a bar.

    There are those who want a perfect formula, or who think that somehow following rules A, B, and C will get them a chance. Those that follow this train of thought tend to like the system because if it fails, then they can blame the system rather than themselves.

    The second type are those who have a will to pickup (as opposed to Nietzsche's will to power, though I suppose a will to pickup would be one aspect of the same quality). If you just swallow your pride and go and talk to the woman you've been making eyes with 2 or 3 times, you'll have a decent chance.

    Here's a hint for you -- women who look at you do it for the same reason that you look at them -- you have a chance.

    Sit on a subway or a bus or something, and just see how many people you can make regular eye contact with. Assuming you aren't a hideously deformed creature of the night wearing fishnets, there will probably be a handful amongst the crowd.

    Once you make that first eye contact, it will happen again and again most times.

    That's where most people stop. They don't have the sack to do anything about it, and you both leave knowing as much about the other person as you did getting into the train. If you want to ease into it, get some business cards printed up with, "Thanks for showing me your eyes" and your phone number and name on it. Nothing creepy, no words, just give it to them and move along.

    Most won't call, I would guess, but if they do, it only cost you the price of a business card, and who knows, maybe you'll get along well with one.

    If you want to do it in a club, then just go up to her and start dancing. Here's a hint for you -- women don't care if you can't dance. They just want you to try. Walk up to her and just start dancing with her. Swallow your pride and just go for it. Okay?

    There is no reason to be so durned nervous. They're only women.

    Exhibit your will to pickup and tell that doubting thomas inside you to shuttup and take it elsewhere, because you want a chance with a woman, and you don't have a very good one when you're second-guessing your every move and trying to blame it on someone other than yourself.
     
  16. TurdFergusen

    TurdFergusen Banned

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    Also, having Xzibit pimp your ride couldn't hurt either.
     
  17. Pierrot le Fou

    Pierrot le Fou IncGamers Member

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    I think even the most anti-social shut-in takes that as a given.

    Nietzsche wrote about 'pimpin your ride' as well, but it was one of his lesser known works, Thus Spake My Biatch.
     
  18. Namyeknom

    Namyeknom IncGamers Member

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    Out of interest, do the fishnets futher damage your chances if your a deformed creature of the night?

    Nothing creepy? A business card with "Thanks for showing me your eyes"? Sounds damn creepy to me. May as well go the whole hog, "Thanks for showing me your eyes, but they'd look better in my fridge...".
     
  19. Pierrot le Fou

    Pierrot le Fou IncGamers Member

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    It increases your chances of being killed by aliens while mounting a phallic radio tower.

    Which is cool if you're into that sorta thing.

    Okay, so bad choice of phrase. Pick "Thanks for making me smile" or a blank card with your name and phone number on it. Whatever. The point is that if you are doing it and leaving, there is nothing creepy about it because there's no pressure on her to have to deal with her, and it's entirely non-confrontational.

    The point is that you're acknowledging the pure chemistry of the moment without putting any pressure on anyone to do anything about it immediately or confront it directly, while giving them a chance to make good on it if they'd like.

    There is nothing creepy about showing attraction.

    I was in a bar the other night reading a book and drinking beer. There was another lone foreigner in the bar who was ogling anything with Japanese ancestors without a Y chromosome in an utterly creepy way. He wasn't making eye contact with people, just staring, and THAT is creepy. I was there to read my book, and made eye contact with some woman, smiled, and kept reading. She came over to me and started talking to me, and complained about the man who kept staring at women as if they were meat.

    Nothing about what I did was creepy in the slightest, but what he did WAS creepy. It has nothing to do with making eye contact or acknowledging eye contact, it's about going above and beyond natural attraction to try to create something that isn't there.
     
  20. olie0923

    olie0923 IncGamers Member

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    Ok, not to sound like a dick or anything but how about just going up to the girl and introducing yourself. You'll be surprised how many responses you'll get compared to the ones you'll get with chessy pickup lines. It's not like you would have anything to lose. If she disses you then you probably won't see her again anyway. If she is a regular, then you probably want to stay away from her anyway. Just swallow your pride and grow some and everything will be ok.

    And Ole Pierrot has a point. I knew a guy in the Army that was not the most attractive guy but cool. He was able to pick up chicks like crazy. Especially when he got drunk. Not sloppy drunk but having a good time drunk. He just had this thing about him at that point. He would look chicks in the eye and wouldn't do anything a strangler or crazy person would do. We kind of called it the Mikah Suave. If you find the "suave", you'll find the women.
     

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