How can I politely bow out?


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How can I politely bow out?

Everyday, I take a speed walk. I usually go at a clip of 3 mph..but, I am pulling a wagon with Samara.

The neighborhood ladies today decided to corner me and ask if I would join an exercise group. That would be fine and dandy but they walk to slow. There is no way they can keep up with me and I can't go at their pace and reap any benefits. One of them walked with me today and couldn't keep up and she was not pulling a wagon with 45 lbs of toddler in it.

I walk fast pulling Samara for cardio. They can't do it even without pulling anything.

So, I have to think of something nice to say not to hurt their feelings. In no way am I willing to tone down my workout.

I can't be mean to them, but they just can't keep up the pace I do and with my limited time, I have to make it work.


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Hrm...frankly, I don't see a much better option just telling them the truth, so long as you do it tactfully. If you say to them that you simply prefer a significantly faster pace and offer them to join you at that speed whenever they like, then you're at least being forthright about it and noting that you have no problem with them personally. I also don't know about Samara, but she may enjoy being pulled at faster speeds...might be a consideration worth bringing up, if it is a factor.


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just say, with a smile and a laugh, and without losing your pace, "Hey, if you can keep up, you're more than welcome to join me!"


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Zodi, this is probably easier said than done (pun intended) but just be honest. Tell them you walk at a very fast pace now and that they are welcome to keep up but at this point in time you won't allow yourself to go slower. Whatever happens, happens.


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Be flattered that they want you to join their group. One of them obviously went out of her way to make contact with you. Like the others said, be honest, with out hurting their feelings. Perhaps you can do your warm up/cool down routines together and you set your own pace in the middle. You are a creative woman, I am sure you can figure something out. It never hurts to know some of the other women in the neighborhood.


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Just say you prefer to exercise by yourself at your own pace. Make up something about enjoying the peaceful alone time. Thank them profusely for their considerateness and politely decline That's perfectly acceptable; if someone takes offence that's her problem, not yours.

Actually, if you hadn't walked with the one lady you could have pretended that they were going to quickly for you.


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Yeah you can just do the airhead thing:

"oh my gosh, you wanna join me?! omg omg...that'd be so wonderful! why don't we meet and get started, ok see you ladies at 6AM tommorrow!!!"

Do it like a stepford wife and be all happy and cheery, then zoom off with a smile on your face. Never put on a mean face.

When you're all done and they're panting still, just go "well ladies I'm all done! Thanks for joining me - that walk was lovely. See you again tommorrow morning? Anyways gotta go - bye!"

That way you're not being mean, you're not being nasty, you're being super sweet about it. Just like a housewife in the old days, with her blue polka-dotted house dress, heels, vacuum and a smile for her husband when he comes home.


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OMG, just say it to them. Why must you pose a question here before you do anything in real life??? There, I said it. Sorry.


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D.K.night said:
Just like a housewife in the old days, with her blue polka-dotted house dress, heels, vacuum and a smile for her husband when he comes home.
good times....bring back the 50's. :girly:
myleftfoot said:
OMG, just say it to them. Why must you pose a question here before you do anything in real life??? There, I said it. Sorry.
She's looking for validation of what she already thinks. Many people look for it before going and acting. It's a security thing, women love that stuff.


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I don't want to hurt their feelings. Today, I shaved 5 mins off my 2 mile walk.

They are trying to start an exercise program to get in shape. They just don't understand how exercise works. Yes, any activity is better than none, but the heart rate needs to be at a certain rate for a specified amount of time to burn fat. A slow saunter is just not going to cut it.

I do 2 miles in just under 35 mins. pulling Sam in her wagon. It is a very brisk pace and she just loves it. She sings to me the whole time we are out. And believe me..pulling a wagon with a toddler at that pace is not easy.

I will go to their weekly meetings to be encouraging. They are all 10+ years older than me so I don't have that much in common with them. At the meetings we will talk about what exercise works for us. Now, I can't say spinning or wall climbing because they just can't do that.

Last night one of the ladies walked a bit with me. It was slow. Even pulling the wagon my heart rate was barely over normal. She was about to die. She managed 1/4 mile before she gave up.

I don't want to discourage them, but they want to exercise 15 mins. 3 times a week. That may be fine to start out with but I am past the starting out point. My pace is almost a slow jog..pulling a 40 pound object.

Maybe I can come up with an excuse that will be encouraging to them.

I have to do this for me. I was recently diagnosed with high blood pressure. Both of my parents have had heart bypasses, my mom has high sugar. Consistant cardio will help with both of those. I don't want to end up like them.

Maybe I am wrong, but if I am not exhausted and sweating like a pig when I am done, it was not a workout.

I do need to lift more. I have the athletic body type. Tall..large frame..lots of muscle, at least in my lower half. I don't want any more muscle mass in my lower body. I need to consentrate on upper body lifting. My arms are weak. My back is weak. I don't want to look like a female body builder, but I need definition in my upper body and abs. Abs especially. Over my lifetime..I have lost over 400 pounds. My muscles are shot. I don't know what to do about that short of a tummy tuck and rearrangement of the ab muscles.


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You can just say you feel like working out by yourself or you want some alone time with your daughter.

And any activity, regardless of heart rate will burn fat. If you are moving, you are burning calories, simple as that.


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Wait until they aren't looking, then run all the way around the block so you're back to the same position just in time for them to look back in your direction.