Hollyweird gets zombies, ghosts and vampires wrong

alexzed

Diabloii.Net Member
Hollywood lied to me too!

I got in a fight, and was surprised that when 35 ninjas punched me in the face, I was unable to get up slowly, wiping the blood from the corner of my mouth, smiling grimly, and take them all to the cleaners. Instead I have this metal plate in my head...please don't turn on that microwave....
 

Talga Vasternich

Diabloii.Net Member
alexzed said:
Hollywood lied to me too!

I got in a fight, and was surprised that when 35 ninjas punched me in the face, I was unable to get up slowly, wiping the blood from the corner of my mouth, smiling grimly, and take them all to the cleaners. Instead I have this metal plate in my head...please don't turn on that microwave....
that does explain a lot

*ducking*
 

pedu

Diabloii.Net Member
Ghosts dont walk... they flow or whatever its called. :rolleyes: They just act like theyre walking because they dont want to be ghosts, they want to be humans. And humans walk.
 

bladesyz

Diabloii.Net Member
But if a ghost can walk through walls, it must be "material-less", the authors argue, and incapable of exerting force.

By the same token, a ghost that can walk through walls should also sink through the floor, and a ghost that can walk should be bouncing off the walls it tries to pass through.
That's retarded. If a ghost is immaterial, then obviously it would not be affected by gravity!

But the paper says physics, which suggests that a sense of cold is correlated more to the rate at which heat is transferred from bodies to the environment than actual temperature, can provide an explanation.
One of the more overused fallacies in paranormal research. Just because there exists a mundane explanation for a phenomena, doesn't mean that explanation is necessarily correct! Many skeptics ignore the tenets of the scientific method when they use this argument.

Efthimiou and Gandhi also use the mathematical principle of geometric progression to rule out the existence of vampires.

They argue it would take just two and a half years for vampires to wipe out the entire human race from the day the first one appeared, based on the myth that vampires turn their victims into other vampires by sucking their blood.
It doesn't take rocket scientists to figure out that the whole "get turned into a vampire when bitten" thing is retarded. I mean, that's the whole premise of why zombie plagues are so dangerous!
 

Module88

Diabloii.Net Member
Pathetic. As far as ghosts are concerned, it's quite possible AFAIK for ghosts to materialize temporarily and mess with our realm (if only for a short period of time). There are plenty of reports of paranormal, ghostly, activity, where humans have been even attacked and injured by ghosts. That's just speculation on my part (I'm not a ghost hunter, in case you forgot), but as pointed out, it's a stupid idea. And of course, that's assuming we know everything about Physics- that beings in other dimensions (or however the exist) can't interact with us while abiding by the laws of the physics of their dimension.

As for vampires... shameful. Anyone here ever heard of a blood bank? No?

"Drr, let's try to kill the whole human race by sucking on their blood and turning them into vampires!" Yes. Let's have the entire human race fight us and try to exterminate us. We're only outnumbered a few billion to ten or so. I don't think so. :rolleyes:
 

Stoutwood

Diabloii.Net Member
Well, the newest incarnation of vampires in Hollywood tend to be pretty much just a race of people that are immortal and drink blood. I don't believe they turn other people into vampires.
 

Dondrei

Diabloii.Net Member
Another valuable announcement from the Department of the Bleeding Obvious.

There are no other realms, ghosts are psychic imprints left in the world. They don't have any physical existence, you only see them in your mind. Since they are not a physical phenomenon science has nothing to say on the matter.

P.S. I'm not sure whether or not I believe in ghosts.

As for vampires, he's assuming they're the kind that feed once a day and always create other vampires with their bite. Obviously that one is nonsense.

P.P.S. Obviously I don't believe in vampires.

bladesyz said:
One of the more overused fallacies in paranormal research. Just because there exists a mundane explanation for a phenomena, doesn't mean that explanation is necessarily correct! Many skeptics ignore the tenets of the scientific method when they use this argument.
This is true, I've often seen scientists (or at least people with a scientific education who ought to know better) dismissing the existence of a phenomenon based on the (perceived anyway) ludicrous nature of a theory that explains it. For instance "Astrology can't work because no physical force from the planets can have a significant effect on the human mind at this distance". The phenomenon in question is that (in the case of natal astrology) a person's birthchart accurately describes their personality, if you want to disprove the existence of the phenomenon you can't do it by disproving a theory that supposedly explains it.

Stoutwood said:
Well, the newest incarnation of vampires in Hollywood tend to be pretty much just a race of people that are immortal and drink blood. I don't believe they turn other people into vampires.
I hate the new vampires.
 

Sokar Rostau

Diabloii.Net Member
A person has to drink the blood of a vampire to be turned. AFAIK this is the same in almost all version of the story. A vampire wants to sup on your blood then you're dead, as in the dead-dead type of dead not undead dead type of dead. Also, why would anything annihilate it's entire food supply? To ignore a basic principle of survival on the one hand and one of the key principles of a legend is not very scientific and casts doubt on everything else.
 

Dondrei

Diabloii.Net Member
Although that is the most common modern version, there were millions of different versions in the old days. I think that one was actually invented recently. The vampires of myth barely resemble the modern ones, in fact the idea of vampire fangs was invented in the movies.
 

bladesyz

Diabloii.Net Member
dondrei said:
Although that is the most common modern version, there were millions of different versions in the old days. I think that one was actually invented recently. The vampires of myth barely resemble the modern ones, in fact the idea of vampire fangs was invented in the movies.
*cough* Anne Rice *cough*
 

Keldaris

Diabloii.Net Member
first of all a vampire can feed off the blood of anything, horses, sheep, cattle...all are easily accessible. And there is more than one kind of vampire, blood drinking(sanguine), and energy(pranic). neither need to drain a human to the point of death. as to spreading it, like many it may be something most people are immune to, spreading to a few with a lower resitance.
 

Dondrei

Diabloii.Net Member
If a vampire feeds off an animal do you get vampire animals?

Stoutwood said:
Yeah, they're almost as bad as the new zombies.
I don't mind the new zombies so much, they should really be considered a separate category though. I mean, it totally changes the dynamic of a zombie film if they can move fast.

But if you mean those ones from - what was it, Land of the Dead? - that can think and use guns, then yeah. That's absolutely moronic.
 

bladesyz

Diabloii.Net Member
dondrei said:
I don't mind the new zombies so much, they should really be considered a separate category though. I mean, it totally changes the dynamic of a zombie film if they can move fast.
The running zombies actually make them a credible threat now. It's just ridiculous how slow moving zombies can be of any threat to people armed with modern weapons.

Although, it kinda makes sense for the newly dead to be able to run, and for the older ones to be slow, as rigor mortis sets in.
 

PlagueBearer

Diabloii.Net Member
Ghosts: Each lving being is surrounded by magnetic energy called a "morphic feild" by scientists and an "aura" by psychics before that. When humans die, typically their morphic feild will dissipate. Many humans, however, have some limited ability to maipulate their morphic feilds (telekinetics), espceially during periods of extreme stress. When such an individual dies while under such a mental strain (as is often the case with violent deaths) their morphic feild may persist attatched to another place, object, or person. This is what people commonly refer to as "ghosts." We of the paranormal reasearch community call the RHMFs (Risidual Human Morphic Feilds)

RHMFs are not sentient or intelligent: they generally stay in one place, stuck in a sort of loop until the loop is broken. They can cause lower temperatures in their location due to the properties of the interactions of the RHMF and whatever magnetic feild it has become attached to. Anyone with even an inkling of psycic (psycic = the ability to sense morphic feilds) ability detect them as a feeling of fear, ie, "the willies." More advanced psycics (or with stronger RHMFs) often see images of the person who died, hear their voice, and can sometimes even sense the "goal" of the RHMF, or what the person who died was focusing his telekinetic talent (latent or otherwise) on accieving.

Some very strong RHMFs, or several interconnected RHMFs have been known to cause magnetic distubances which can move objects, though this movement is rarely connected to its "goal" in anyway: it is simple chaos.

Often once the "goal" is accieved, this breaks the telekinic loop and the RHMF dissipates. In the case of a murder, this is often the dissipation of the Morphic Feild of the murderer (ie, death.) If the RHMF is connected instead to a place or an object, generally the destuction of the building or the object is enough to dissipate the RHMF. Strong magnets can temporarily interefere with these feilds, but the effect dissapears as soon as the magnet is removed.


Vampires: A highly advanced virus with many strains. Like all viruses, these tiny proto-organisms attach themselves to the cells of the host and alter the DNA of that cell in order to force the cell to create more of the virus, which them explode from the cell and infect other cells. Unlike most viruses, vampyrism does not destroy most of the cells it infects (aside, notably, the bone marrow), but rather mutates them. Most strains tend to turn their host into albinos, removing the pigment from their skin, making them very succeptable to UV radiation.

As the many strains of the virus evolved, it began to carry benefits for the host: it halts production of a muscle-inhibiting hormone, making the host very strong, and causes increased sensitivity to light and sound, effectivly enhancing the senses of the host but making sunlight even more painful. String odors (such as garlic, but many such smells work) will irritate their strong olfactory senses. Vampires tend to have brain activity at much higher levels than ininfected humans, which leads to higher intelligence, reflexes, and enhances psycic and telekinetic abilities. The virus itself is also a bacteriophage, attacking any microbes in the hosts body, making him virtually immune to other illnesses and increasing his longevity.

As noted before, however, the main downside to Vamprism is the destruction of the Bone Marrow: this makes the host unable to create blood for themselves. Likely ancestral vampyres were very short lived, driven mad by the virus (which is a distant relative of rabies) they could bite other people to spread it then die in a few weeks. However, when the virus began to slect for longevity over spreading speed, it created a mechanism to deal with this defect: the stomach of modern vampires produces little in the way of enzymes or acids, allowing any blood from victims to pass directly to their intestines where it is absorbed as-is by the intestinal wall, giving them a fresh source of new red blood cells. This also make vampyres unable to eat normal food; all their nutritional needs must come from the blood of the victim.

Around the same time the hemophagia developed, most strains of vampyism became contractable by blood only, unable to persist in the saliva of the host; early vampires had no modern means of transportation, after all, and as soon as they drained their village dry they would die out, so contraction became more difficult to preserve the virus and it's host's ability to stay alive.

Movies get alot right about vampires: they avoid sunlight (though it doesn't "dust" them, it will kill them after prolonged exposure, and can easily blind them) and are very hard to kill. They heal quickly because no infection can take hold in any wounds, and they can replace any lost blood simply by feeding. They must feed around twice a week to replace the blood as it wears out. They sleep in a "death like" hibernation state to preserve the nutrients from each feeding.

While saliva-borne vamprism is now extinct, it did exist at one time.
 

PlagueBearer

Diabloii.Net Member
dondrei said:
Did she invent that idea? Or just popularise it? I'm not sure.
Modern vampires do have fangs, but this is not due to enlargment of the canines: instead, the gums recede and the other teeth bend in towards the back of the mouth (or fall out all together)

Mosty new vapires don't survive long enough to deform in this way, however. This takes several months of infection.
 

PlagueBearer

Diabloii.Net Member
dondrei said:
If a vampire feeds off an animal do you get vampire animals?
Vampires cannot feed on animals, but some try out of desperation and make themselves very ill. Remeber that vampires don't "eat" blood, they absorb it for use within their own bodies.
 
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