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Friends

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by Ace_wanderer, Apr 7, 2005.

  1. Ace_wanderer

    Ace_wanderer IncGamers Member

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    Friends

    When I was at school in my younger days(around 12 years old) I had quite a lot of friends but as I got older most of my friends changed. Im 17 years old now and the people I once considered friends I wouldnt consider friends anymore.

    It seems that when I went to high school everyone started changing trying to be cool, trying to be cool around girls and trying to be in with the crowd. I remember when I had friends who would never insult each other and have respect.

    I dont think Ive changed much but everyone around me has, I dont have that many friends anymore.

    So what about you guys notice a change in your friends as you grew up?
     
  2. Raistlin Majere

    Raistlin Majere IncGamers Member

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    What's a Friend?
     
  3. Ash Housewares

    Ash Housewares IncGamers Member

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    not really, no
     
  4. Ace_wanderer

    Ace_wanderer IncGamers Member

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    Good point.
     
  5. Empired

    Empired IncGamers Member

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    I thought that was one of those computer nerd jokes, like "What's this 'outdoors' you speak of?"

    Anyway, yes, my friends are very different. I went to the local public school for grades 1-6, then to a private school for 7-8 (and made entirely new friends in the process), then back to the public high school for 9-10, where- although all of the people who I had gone to elementary school were there- I my group of friends was very different, and finally to Sweden for 11th grade. My friends are different because they have to be; I keep switching schools.

    But are they the same TYPE of people? That's hard to answer. I don't really have a "group," so my friends are very different from one another to begin with.
     
  6. Tor

    Tor IncGamers Member

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    friends. peopel who trust you


    some stupid person is spreading rumors about me at school which got me arrested and searched then they realized im 100% clean.


    i consider my friends oto be the peopel who tell them this is pure BS and to shove off

    edit hi empired looks liek you came back for otcars
     
  7. Dredd

    Dredd D3 Off Topic Moderator

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    My high-school class became very clique-oriented when we merged with another local school. Ours had a LOT of bullies and teachers absolutely hated us. I spent more time in high-school fighting than I did doing homework. We also worked up a sterling record of nine dropouts out of a class of only 30-something - the constant bs was just too much for some of the kids, including me. I dropped out as a junior and didn't get my diploma until a year after the rest of my classmates graduated.

    Most of my lasting friendships came during my college years. Heck, most of my lasting self-esteem came during my college years. I was so brainwashed in high school that I was convinced I was a piece of garbage. Sad story really - no kid should ever have to feel that way.

    In summary: Ace_wanderer, no matter how bad you think things are for you and your class, take comfort in knowing that my experience was a 1,000 times worse. And though I shudder to imagine it, mine is certainly not the worst story you'll ever hear. So buck up! The best friends (and lovers) you'll ever have will come along when you least expect it. :thumbsup:

    The high-school junk is transient. 10 years from now you'll barely remember (or give a flying crap about) any of it.
     
  8. Carnage-DVS

    Carnage-DVS IncGamers Member

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    I was lucky enough to form strong,lasting friendships in both the schools I attended. I have 4-5 very close friends from Pakistan, and I made 6-7 very close friends while attending school in Paris.We don't need cliques, we just enjoy each others company.
     
  9. Empired

    Empired IncGamers Member

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    Nah, I came back a little bit before. I did try (unsuccessfully) to snag myself an OTCar nomination, though. :(
     
  10. Ash Housewares

    Ash Housewares IncGamers Member

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    I was going to nominate you for gone but not forgotten but I forgot you, ZING! sorry, don't hurt me
     
  11. Empired

    Empired IncGamers Member

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    I just confessed that I constantly confuse you with three other posters, so I guess we're even.

    *hurts Ash anyway*
     
  12. Ace_wanderer

    Ace_wanderer IncGamers Member

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    Im not really in a bad place, Ive lost some friends but I still have a few good friends. I dont mind being alone.

    One thing though Ive never seen anyone get bullied its all light hearted, I live in New Zealand and I hear of bullying all the time but it doesnt go on in my school. Thanks for the encouragement.
     
  13. KnightFall

    KnightFall IncGamers Member

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    I'm now nearly 26 years old and I have none of the same friends I had 12 years ago. When I was 13 we moved house (only 5 miles from where we were). But as I was getting a different bus too school I gradually lost all my childhood friends and made new ones.

    I think I changed though, so it would be like you say for my old friend. I changed, they may still be the same...

    It's a shame, but it happens all the time. People just move on. I'm sure that in another 12 years I'll have a load of different friends again. There are one or two, that I'd say now, I will never lose, but you never know...

    KnightFall
     
  14. CyberHawk

    CyberHawk IncGamers Member

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    Freinds are trouble..in most cases. Althought most of mine are in jail (seriously), I really only had 1 good freind growing up. He happend to be the biggest drug dealers around..he tried to stay clean for me and my brother.
    So him and my brother where my 2 best friends.
    But now my wife is my best freind, but my brother has my trust over everyone else.
     
  15. Necrolestes

    Necrolestes IncGamers Member

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    From a schizoid perspective

    I never really had any close friends growing probably because I had trust issues (or more to the point, I expected too much from the people I knew and when they couldn't meet those outrageously high expectations, I ceased to trust them...sad, really, but something that I dealt with). I also had a massive ego and was bitter, narcissistic, and manipulative. Needless to say, I didn't have friends in high school.

    In college, though, something changed. I met a few people who changed my outlook on life and I became more of a positive person. I kept my ego in check and instead of lording my intelligence over people, I used it to help them. This got me further in life than manipulation ever could. Though I haven't kept in touch over the years, I still consider my college friends to be friends, albeit distant ones.

    In medical school, I briefly reverted to my high school self before I remembered what I had learned in college. Before any damage was done, I rectified the situation and managed to make friends rather than break friends.

    People and times change, as do friendships. Stay true to self and you will never lack companionship.
     
  16. Merick

    Merick IncGamers Member

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    Well, my former best friend got a girlfriend and suddenly he didn't have any time for anyone else. And he became a real asshole.

    But generally, people were much nicer in high school than in middle school.
     
  17. MixedVariety

    MixedVariety Banned

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    To reiterate what some others have said, as you grow and you change, so does your taste in friends. From my high school days, I only retained two of my very best friends out of dozens, and one of those committed suicide a few years back, so it's down to one.

    Friends are transient. Every time I've changed jobs, for instance, most of the friends from my old job dropped out of sight and mind, making way for new ones. In my neighborhood we have a few friendships with families that have children the same ages as ours, but the children are the connection. I expect that when my kids grow up, those neighbors will fade away as friendships as well.

    What I have come to realize over the years, though, is that family is where your true heart lies. I have four brothers, dozens of cousins, nieces, nephews, etc...and after all the years that is all I truly care about. We are a huge extended family and remain tighter than any friends could.
     
  18. Raistlin Majere

    Raistlin Majere IncGamers Member

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    When I walked out of the gym at my graduation, I did so determined never to see them again. I was alot like Necro minus the ego, and was subject to alot of crap. I used to be beaten up alot in Middle School, but that changed at HS, because I finally had enough of it. the few fights I was involved with got me suspended because even some of the higher ups did not like me. It really ticked me off when I get in trouble for defending myself and the kid who started it got away with it. Thank god I moved again my senor year.

    I ran into a girl from my HS a while back. she tried to pick up a conversation while I ignored her. I was walking away when she said something about being friends, when I whipped around and told her to drop dead. Hell will freeze over before they can think of friendship after the **** they dragged me through.

    I do honestly believe the term friend is tossed loosely around those days. I myself honestly only know two people I can call friends.
     
  19. Necrolestes

    Necrolestes IncGamers Member

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    The high road

    Ah, Raistlin, the path not taken. I contacted some of the people I had considered enemies in high school about four years ago and rather than insult them or beg them to apologize for the way I thought they had treated me, I asked them to forgive me. I had been truly vile in the way I treated them and I wanted them to know that I had changed (some didn't believe me while others were surprised that I, the master of deception and manipulation, was being honest in my apology). I also needed to prove to myself that I had changed (after all, I had been so good at being bad, and duplicity had come so naturally to me, that maybe it was just another trick, another ploy, another way to control and dominate). I am glad to say that thanks to those conversations, I had changed...for the better, not the bitter.

    It's easy to forget but hard to forgive. I have chosen the latter path after a fashion, and I am the better person for it. You ought to give those who slighted you a chance to explain themselves, Raistlin. In middle school, I was the one who was put upon because I had very little muscle mass (though I knew exactly where to land my blows so as to cause maximum pain...a vile thought, now, but then I thought that was a legitimate way to fight back) and was a typical nerd. It colored my view of my world and made me, well, a bitter person. But you have to learn to forgive if you want to move on with your life...you do not want to become what I was.
     
  20. Raistlin Majere

    Raistlin Majere IncGamers Member

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    I thought about that, but I have completly lost track of everyone's numbers. not to mention I live 700 miles away from there. I'll think about it.

    Besides, I am a college freshman, I will want to give them a few years to grow up.
     

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