So I have thought it over many times, and I think I have come to a conclusion on this whole thing. And since some of you expressed interest in hearing about it, and since it would probably help to talk about it, I'm going to post it. I reserve the right to take it down for any reason at all. (Spoiler tags to avoid WoT): Spoiler I think I've mentioned my sister briefly here, but probably just to say I never talk about her. It is a very long story, but we used to be very close to each other and now, well, it has been nearly 5 years since I've seen her. Ties were totally severed, communication is nonexistent, save only for a cousin supplying us with any crucial information via FaceBook. From this, I have learned that she is either married or engaged, and has a daughter, my niece. I never exactly had a say in this split, I just woke up one day and words had been exchanged and minds made up. I think this is what caused some of the problems. So now we jump to last Sunday, and the grocery store down the street. Me and my brother were just getting a couple things, stuff we didn't even really need. I walked in the door, grabbed a basket, and placed it upon my head, as usual. I do this 5 or 6 times a week, so I know the store so well I barely pay attention anymore. That may be why I was so take aback when I heard a barely familiar voice say my name. I looked right at her, and it actually took a moment to identify the face. That also disturbs me, since I can name on sight every president of the United States and most winners of the Tour de France. So she said hello, and I was sort of dumbfounded, but I was able to (barely) form my mouth into "hi". I have thought of what I would say so many times, if I would demand answers, or apologize, or just try to play it cool and act as though I never thought about any of it. What I managed to do was panic and look stupid. People say they were speechless, but I've never actually experience that. It isn't cool. She asked how I was, and if I was still in school, and said she had been spying on my FaceBook and that my cycling was cool. I didn't say anything. She said she had a daughter, and I had a niece, and asked if I would like to meet her, and I didn't say anything. Said niece arrived, accompanied by fiance or husband or whatever, and made small talk. This I am good at, and I returned said small talk, but still could not forge an intelligent sentence. Then, before I realized what was going on, she said it was good seeing me and then goodbye, and I walked away. I never asked her why, I never demanded any answers or any apologies, I just froze. So, the big question I have been processing this entire week is: Should I enforce this embargo of sorts the family has going against her? I thought of every time I could remember talking to, about, or even near her, searching for any reason that I should have walked away from her. I found none. As far as I could tell, the issue basically boiled down to my mom vs my sister, and I was caught in the middle. So what do I do? I am considering some sort of clandestine contact, but I don't know what would happen if I were to be caught. I don't know what to do, and I can't silence the idea that I should have said something, whether it was to yell at her or say something mushy or just anything at all. All I know is that my brain hurts, and I no longer want to be alone with my thoughts, all that gives me is an endless loop or serious questions and big problems that I cannot solve. tl;dr - Pancake is a wuss who writes overly dramatic crap and thinks people will read it. Dew please. WoT complete. Trainer time, maybe I can ride until all this stuff goes away.