DANTOSE is WRONG [REAL RELATIONSHIP FAQ HERE]

superman22

Diabloii.Net Member
DANTOSE is WRONG [REAL RELATIONSHIP FAQ HERE]

ok.. he was totally wrong.. dont listen to him.


Q: my gf/bf broke up with me and I think I might be able to get them back. should I try?
Dantose: no

superman22: if you think you can get them back, you must travel to the top of tibet. ask the hairless monk what he prefers, "apples or cups". if he says apples. you should not try. if he says cups, beat him up until he says apples


Q: But what if [insert any reason here]?
Dantose :still no

superman22: honestly. 100% scientifically tested. tried and true method for centuries, passed on from generation to generation. the only sure way of knowing is to shake the ball we like to call "magic eight ball". no less than 22 shakes will reveal the correct answer.

Q: Does age matter?
Dantose: Yes and no. Age is important only in its tie to experiance. A 21 y/o who has lived on his own since he was 18 and who has a steady job with some sort of future (not Mickey D's or the supermarket) will be more ready to commit than a 27 y/o still living at home or working in a dead end job/bouncing around jobs. If you are still in highschool don't even discuss marriage. You are not ready.

superman22: age does matter a lot. no "yes and no" bs. age matters 100%
heres the formula
if youre A
and your lover is B

try this formula out. ((143(A)^ 637(B) )/ (413533x-151y)! - 1578336)(0)
if the answer you get is a negative number, you and your girl are destined to be together forever

if the answer you get is 0, try the formula again. keep trying :)

if the answer you get is positive, you are a failure. you were born as a failure. and you will always be a failure.


Q: I think I'm ready.
Dentose: No you're not

Superman22: refer to previous question

Q: Yes I am, this is true love.
Dentose: No you're not

Superman: :yep: what is love? baby dont hurt me.. baby dont hurt me.. no mor... oops.. um.. i mean... nm .

Q: Does money matter?
Dentose: Yes, but not in the sense of how much the other person has. Look at spending habits. Do they eat out a lot? Do they buy things they can't afford? Do they have credit card debt? Are they on drugs? If the answer to any of those questions is yes use caution. Spending habits are where people become broke. Being broke sucks. If you marry someone who is broke you will likely end up broke.

Superman22: money will never be a problem cause if you ever have any money issues. here is a sure fire way to get $1 million+

the next lotto number will be:
4 23 15 32 11 29 7

there you go! trust me.


Q: All you need is love, right?
Dentose: No, you need commitment. No matter how much you love some one, if you marry you will go through periods where you can't stand the other person. You won't even like them. Commitment is what gets you through those times. Sign a pre-nup too.

Superman22: my friends.... in life... all you need is...

ME!!! really! but too bad there is only 1 of me to go around..
first come first serve!!
my number is 909)59.... hey! wait!! stop!! let go!! im not done ye.... (punching and kicking sounds in the background.... )

Q: We don't need a pre_nup because we won't ever divorce.
Dentose: There are two possibilities:
1. You get divorced. The pre-nup makes it less messy since you agreed on everything before you hated each other.
2. You don't get divorced. The pre-nup sits in a safety deposit box or somewhere and never bothers anyone.
So you either win or you tie. Isn't that a better deal then tie or lose?

Superman22: dont listen to him. he only wants you to write a pre-nup cause he works at the paper company. see his plan! he wants all of you to buy more paper to write prenups, thus giving him more money!
i wouldnt be surprised if he also is involved in the deposit box business...



Q: I want to get engaged but I can't get married for 4 years. Is this a problem?
Dentose: Yes. Engagements are supposed to be fairly short. They give you time to plan the wedding. If you are really "meant to be together" waiting to get get engaged won't hurt. I'd plan on a 6-12 month engagement.

Superman22: no.. the best answer to this is get married first. then get engaged. trust me. dont question. trust.

Q: Haven't you had some bad relationships?
Dentose: Yes, I wasn't following my own advice.

Superman22: nope. all my relationships were perfect. it was always the girl's fault though. i was flawless in every way.





BE WARNED DENTOSE. IF I EVER SEE YOU POSTING ABOUT SUCH MISLEADING NONSENSE AGAIN, I WILL FIGHT FOR WHAT IS RIGHT. I WILL PROTECT THE PEOPLE. THE PEOPLE HAVE THE RIGHT TO KNOW. :thumbsup:

with lots of love :thanks: ,
superman22
 

th5418

Banned
.........This is funny, but somehow dantose's answers are better. If you really need advice that is.
 
th if anyone took this advise seriously they must be pretty damn stupid.

EDIT: I read through the whole thing and noticed he sang the night at the roxyberries song! This is a very good guide.
 

Jedi44

Diabloii.Net Member
I'd say Yaboosh's earlier "Call her a cheaitng hussy and walk out in a pissy fit" was superior to both of these FAQ attempts.
 

Anakha1

Banned
My advice is that if you want to know what it's like to be in love before you actually are, try to sustain a major brain injury. It's pretty close to that.
 

My_Immortal6

Diabloii.Net Member
Anakha1 said:
My advice is that if you want to know what it's like to be in love before you actually are, try to sustain a major brain injury. It's pretty close to that.
You're just bitter. *gives Anakha a lolly*

Love has its perks.
 

Anakha1

Banned
I'm incredibly bitter. But that's not the point. I don't want love. It buggers things up too much.

Now... lollies I like.

*accepts the lollie*
 

superman22

Diabloii.Net Member
??? you guys think im kidding?

these answers took forever to research and prove.
they are proven sure fire way methods

i think i smell a sticky somewhere... ^_~

:winner:
 
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