Curious About Your Thoughts

[hacchantal]

Curious About Your Thoughts

[FONT=&quot]Okay, so I'm a curious cat... I hope curiosity doesn't kill the cat! Here it goes:[/FONT] (Edit: Fudge, gotta to some editing... ehhhhhhhhh! ... copy and paste on this thing is stupid lol.)
[FONT=&quot]
K – so Nathan is one of my best friend’s boyfriend. I’ve known him for over a year now, and he’s been dating his girlfriend, Stephanie (steph), for a little bit over a year, too.

He confused me a lot with this one part of the conversation, and I’m wondering what other people are thinking when he asks me the questions that are bold and italicized. I’m wondering: why does he ask me those questions? And I wonder more since, HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND. I’ve had other people ask me similar questions, and they all admired me at one point in time.

Ok, so the first part of the conversation starts off with his girlfriend paranoid about this girl (she used to go to our high school) that drives buy Stephanie’s house. Her name is Jade, and she drives by Stephanie’s house because she lives not too far away. Stephanie thinks she drives by because Nathan is at Stephanie’s house (he’s currently living there). It’s almost like Stephanie does not trust Nathan; but I don’t know.

Anywho, for your information, Young is my boyfriend. So; is this me being too paranoid? Or is there something behind these questions he asked? There has to be, as you see at the end of the convo. Oh well just wondering what you guys think. Thanks for reading and thanks for your input!


Nathan says:
well stupid jade seems to drive by a lot

Nathan says:
And steph keeps thinking its cuz I’m here

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
yeah it seems steph doesn't like her lol... yeah......

Nathan says:
And its only because she lives like 2 blocks away

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
she just lives buy

Nathan says:
but last night she drove by like 3 times

Nathan says:
i didnt know it was her

Nathan says:
but steph did

Nathan says:
And she’s like she’s prolly driving by because you’re here

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
steph seems good at picking out people she dislikes...

Nathan says:
I was like well she does live like just down there

Nathan says:
and then i got a harssh * I KNOW*

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
lol..

Nathan says:
so i dont know

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
sorry about that don’t know how to fix it

Nathan says:
Yeah

Nathan says:
Its fine

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
it seems she needs to kind of let go of that stuff, you're not going to like everyone you see

Nathan says:
i know

Nathan says:
I like how you see that

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
Lol

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
yeah... i learned that one the hard way kinda

Nathan says:
oh?

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
And I have that problem at work, lots of people I DONT like

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
Well you know the thing that not everyone is going to like you and be your friend... and the other way around

Nathan says:
Yeah

Nathan says:
got a ?

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
Sure

Nathan says:
What did you think of me a year ago

Nathan says:
before I dated Steph

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
hmm lol well I didn’t know you that well... you reminded me of this funny guy I played Diablo with a while back

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
why do you ask:?

Nathan says:
just wondering i suppose

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
lol you suppose?

Nathan says:
yeah

Nathan says:
Anywho

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
lol sorry just bugging you

Nathan says:
no

Nathan says:
Its fine rly

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
haha ok

Nathan says:
No sorries

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
Kk

Nathan says:
Were you dating Young when I knew you?

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
well it was a complicated thing i guess lol. sort of... we hadn't met yet though

Nathan says:
oh yeah

Nathan says:
But youse loved him ?

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
yeah lol

----- A little while later, useless text deleted -----

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
Say lol why did you ask me those questions about young? What are you trying to figure out. lol imp just curious

Nathan says:
Just figuring

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
lol figuring what?

Nathan says:
things

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
bad things? good things? you can be honest, sneaky you

Nathan says:
Maybe bad things

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
lol.
Nathan says:
Maybe Good things? Depends

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
about ?? me? you? young?

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
steph? Lol

Nathan says:
in a way all of us....

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
oh ?

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
hmmmm lol

Nathan says:
Well

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
now im wondering

Nathan says:
Not really

Nathan says:
IF you think about it

Nathan says:
It is all of us

Nathan says:
But if you really think about it

Nathan says:
its not

Nathan says:
Haha

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
yeah, i guess so... but the thing is you're the only one that knows... so it's hard to think about it lol

Nathan says:
Mhm

Nathan says:
tricky part

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
i dont like secrets lol

Nathan says:
i dont either ...

Nathan says:
Belive me its not fun

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
especially when someone tells you that you have a secret

Nathan says:
Hmm

Chantal `•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•``•.¸¸.•´´¯`••.¸¸.•` says:
hmm?

Nathan says:
yes im trying to decide something

Nathan says:
lol
[/FONT]

 

[buttershug]

Nathan is a guy, right?

Ergo he means nothing and was just making convo, or he's thinking of you in a biological "what if" way.

Guys are simple to understand.

 

[hacchantal]

Nathan is a guy, right?

Ergo he means nothing and was just making convo, or he's thinking of you in a biological "what if" way.

Guys are simple to understand.

Yes, he's male.

I don't know if he's making a convo, he's asked me things before about himself... and no this guy is not easy to understand :tongue:. He asked those questions because he wanted to try and figure out something... lol... but what? He kept me guessing... he won't tell me though and I doubt he will. I don't like the fact he even brought it up but wont tell me. So we had a long conversation of nothing... and he's not pulling my tail either.

 

[buttershug]

He may not be pulling your tail but I think tail is involved one way or another.

 

[Quietus]

You wouldn't have posted this here if you didn't already have an idea of what he's thinking about. Odds are, you're on the right track, but he's likely unsure. Being in a relationship with someone who may not trust you has a way of making you unsure of a lot of things.

 

[Voorhees]

You have to ask yourself this: Do you really want to consider a guy who hints around with other girls while he's already with someone? If the answer is no, then it doesn't matter what he meant.

 

[Darkflight]

Nathan seems kind of *** to me. When men start to put hidden agendas in their words, it's a warning sign. :grin:

 

[Quietus]

Darkflight - even if the meanings in those words may not be so.. proper, the fact that a guy can put hidden meaning in his words just means he has more than two brain cells. It also, in this case, means he's nervous about what he appeared to be hinting at - poorly.

In the best cases, a guy who can put hidden meaning in his words without actually giving things away to those who don't need to know ... well, there are uses for that sort of talent.

 

[Darkflight]

Darkflight - even if the meanings in those words may not be so.. proper, the fact that a guy can put hidden meaning in his words just means he has more than two brain cells. It also, in this case, means he's nervous about what he appeared to be hinting at - poorly.

In the best cases, a guy who can put hidden meaning in his words without actually giving things away to those who don't need to know ... well, there are uses for that sort of talent.

Well then, I guess I have only 1 braincell, even though my IQ result on the Mensa IQ-test was 135. :scratch:

Putting hidden meanings in words is for girls and gays in my opinion. Even though he sucked at it, he still tried. A real man say what he thinks without trying to do anything else.

 

[FrankWest]

A real man say what he thinks without trying to do anything else.

Who on Earth fed you that slice of baloney? The average man can quite easily be just as manipulative as the average woman, it's just that men are often perceived as having quite a different and more obvious agenda. "Men don't have hidden agendas" is the same level of ridiculous as "You only use 10% of your brain" and "Males run the planet", et al. They can be tempting to believe, but they're just simply not true.

And don't eeeeeven get me started on this "real man" garbage. Not directing this at you, Darkflight. I'm speaking at our entire gender, here. A real man has a Y-Chromosome. That's it. Everything else is just compensating for one thing or another. Many of the things that people say makes a "real man" are also quite simply known as "being a good person". And everything else that's associated with it, that's all just senseless posturing. I'm not arguing with your example, Dark. In this case, your instance of "a real man" = "a good person". But the phrase, every time I see it, just makes me twitch a little. It speaks to our intrinsic insecurities and the incredible overcompensation that some people feel they need to make in turn. And to speak the plain it would be a whooooole lot less awkward if we as a gender could drop the whole machismo kick we're on and focus on being good people for once.

@ the OP: This guy pretty clearly has a thing for you. He also sounds like a complete sleazeball. A real man would break up with his current girlfriend before playing the field. :thumbsup:

 

[Johnny]

even though my IQ result on the Mensa IQ-test was 135.

No it wasnt.

Putting hidden meanings in words is for girls and gays in my opinion.

Oh yes those pesky gays. When is jesus coming back to take them all away?

A real man say what he thinks without trying to do anything else.

Bull****

 

[Mikk0]

seems to me that someone has some trust issues.. i'dd suggest that the guy deals with them before they'll make an real problem :laugh:

 

[Darkflight]

No it wasnt.



Oh yes those pesky gays. When is jesus coming back to take them all away?



Bull****

Oh yes it was. Then again, my IQ was measured to 89 on a test the Norwegian TV-channel NRK had on their website, so it probably isn't totally correct. :jig:

I never said *** people are bad. It's a stereotype that *** men behave as women do. Not necesarily right, but I happen to like stereotypes. They are fun.

And as far as the saying things as they really are, I can't even understand why people would not. Anything else is just annoying. If you want to say something, do it. If you don't want to, don't. If you are to shy to say it directly, either pull yourself together and say it or let it be. Beeing on the recieving end on a hidden meaning in words spoken is so annoying I usually ignore people who do it to me.

When I say ***, I mean the same thing you would call "metrosexual". The way I see it, beeing *** is not beeing sexually attracted to people of the same sex as you. It's more like men who have to hug people all the time, men who wears pink shirts or wear tuxedos everywhere they go and so on.

When I refer to people who actually are attracted to people of the same sex as them, I call them homosexuals.

 

[Dondrei]

Man, that was hard to read.

Look Chantal, he's a man, all other details are irrelevant. Women have a great deal of difficulty in trying to understand men because they keep trying to understand them, really there's nothing to understand. If a man is talking to you for any length of time then it means he wants in your pants. Even if he didn't start out that way (which is highly unlikely) then he will definitely be thinking about it once the conversation has been going on for a while.

His girlfriend, your boyfriend, your relationship with each other, the current circumstances, none of it matters. He is thinking about tail, he may even deny it to himself but he is.

 

[hacchantal]

You wouldn't have posted this here if you didn't already have an idea of what he's thinking about. Odds are, you're on the right track, but he's likely unsure. Being in a relationship with someone who may not trust you has a way of making you unsure of a lot of things.

Well yes I did have some idea, but I was a little confused. I think he does have a thing for me, or something?!, because I guess it seems he has more fun with me than his girlfriend. For example, we were all playing a card game (miles bournes for the win) and she fell asleep later on, and we stayed up and played games for another few hours while she was sleeping... what kind of girlfriend does that? She even falls asleep at her own house :embarassed:.

I was just trying to figure it out really, is all. I don't want to even get in between those two so to know these things makes me want to back off. Anyway, he's given his girl a promise ring and she bought a watch for him. Seems kind of weird for him to be 'playing the field.' :undecided:

seems to me that someone has some trust issues.. i'dd suggest that the guy deals with them before they'll make an real problem :laugh:

I think not only he has trust problems, but his girl as well.

Man, that was hard to read.

Look Chantal, he's a man, all other details are irrelevant. Women have a great deal of difficulty in trying to understand men because they keep trying to understand them, really there's nothing to understand. If a man is talking to you for any length of time then it means he wants in your pants. Even if he didn't start out that way (which is highly unlikely) then he will definitely be thinking about it once the conversation has been going on for a while.

His girlfriend, your boyfriend, your relationship with each other, the current circumstances, none of it matters. He is thinking about tail, he may even deny it to himself but he is.

Haha sorry for making it hard to read, I edited a lot of it the best I could :\

Well yeah I guess you could say that, and that's what I figured... although it's not exactly what he would probably want at the start, as you said.

 

[Quietus]

I was just trying to figure it out really, is all. I don't want to even get in between those two so to know these things makes me want to back off. Anyway, he's given his girl a promise ring and she bought a watch for him. Seems kind of weird for him to be 'playing the field.' :undecided:

That's precisely what he isn't doing - he isn't coming right out and saying anything. He IS, however, apparently testing the waters to determine what his chances would be if he WERE 'playing the field'. At least, that's what I get from that conversation.

Also, ignore Dondrei's rampant cynicism, not all men are raging hormonal beasts with their brains below their waists. Some? Sure. Not all.

@Darkflight - Interesting though your end of this conversation is, I'm not sure that the direction it's taking is appropriate given the context of this thread. If you want to start a new thread to debate the pros, cons, and causes of men and hidden messages/agendas, feel free to start a new thread and I'll throw that ball back and forth with you.

::Edit:: As for trust issues, Chantal, I wouldn't say this guy has them. His girlfriend? Possibly, from the limited view we're given of her. But based on what we know of the guy, and his interest in testing the waters, it might not be unfounded trust issues. On the other hand, it could be that she has trust issues, and as a result, he's driven to find someone who doesn't have those issues. Either way, it's still lowbrow to be testing the waters while still involved with someone, even if he isn't sure of how that relationship is going.

 

[nebula]

and highschool will never end....... evEr

 

[Stevinator]

::Edit:: As for trust issues, Chantal, I wouldn't say this guy has them. His girlfriend? Possibly, from the limited view we're given of her. But based on what we know of the guy, and his interest in testing the waters, it might not be unfounded trust issues. On the other hand, it could be that she has trust issues, and as a result, he's driven to find someone who doesn't have those issues. Either way, it's still lowbrow to be testing the waters while still involved with someone, even if he isn't sure of how that relationship is going.

oh, phooey! these are kids. the nathan guy clearly is second guessing his current g/f. I see nothing wrong with him chatting people up. it's not like he's married or anything. sometimes when relationships go bad, they're over before they're over. Him fishing is not a sign he'll cheat on his next girlfriend.

 

[RevenantsKnight]

A few things first: I'm not exactly an expert at this sort of thing, and please don't answer any of the hypotheticals I throw out, because I don't want to know.

Since it seems like your friend might have been a bit stressed by his relationship at that point, I guess it's possible that he was just feeling depressed or lost and was looking for an ego/confidence boost by asking. Certainly, this isn't exactly the best way for him to go about doing that, particularly when he starts getting secretive about it, but it could be due to a (relatively) innocent social "oops" than actually meaning anything.

The other explanations that have been offered seem possible to me, too, though this is what came to mind early on for me...not sure if I'd place any one over the other with this relatively limited information. You'd have a better idea on this matter, I'm sure, and maybe this "sounds like him" (or maybe not. :tongue: ) Anyway, hope that was useful somehow.

 

[Bortaz]

Well yes I did have some idea, but I was a little confused. I think he does have a thing for me, or something?!, because I guess it seems he has more fun with me than his girlfriend. For example, we were all playing a card game (miles bournes for the win) and she fell asleep later on, and we stayed up and played games for another few hours while she was sleeping... what kind of girlfriend does that? She even falls asleep at her own house :embarassed:.

And now we see the young damsel beginning to rationalize cheating with her friends boyfriend by villainizing the "bad" girlfriend.

K – so Nathan is one of my best friend’s boyfriend.