Age: All the difference?

[Smelly]

Age: All the difference?

I just wanted to have people's opinion about this, it won't affect anything I just want to see where everyone stands on an issue like this:

Is a relationship between two people with a 3 1/2 year difference in age at the ages of 16 and 19 something you yourself would look down on? Just based on that, mind you.

 

[Wuhan_Clan]

Just from those numbers I see that one is legally and adult and one is not. A real relationship is possible no matter the age difference but they usually occur when both participants are relatively mature. By that I mean both are legally adults. I don't know the people involved but by numbers alone, I would say no, this is not a serious relationship.

 

[Technetium]

I don't look down on it. Doesn't really matter to me.

 

[ZeppelinAngel]

I just wanted to have people's opinion about this, it won't affect anything I just want to see where everyone stands on an issue like this:

Is a relationship between two people with a 3 1/2 year difference in age at the ages of 16 and 19 something you yourself would look down on? Just based on that, mind you.

nope.. we met when i was 16 1/2, and we were 3 years and 1 month apart

 

[giantpinkbunnyhead]

My g/f and I are exactly 4 years apart. When we started dating, she was 17 and I 21. It's been five years, and looking back, it's not so easy to say it was a hurdle. At first I thought it would be, because me being 21 meant I knew it all and her being a teeniebopper meant she knew nothing. But now, looking back I see I didn't know diddly when I was 21, therefore I wasn't much farther along then she was at 17. I think the bigger issue that can develop, is the one that involves parting paths for college, or when one of you wants to settle down when the other one still is chasing a career or college or something. I think if you have the same goals, then you have at least an average chance of working around an age difference.

On the other hand, my dad remarried when he was 44, and his new wife was 26. Now that didn't work so well. It lasted a year before she disappeared with all his money. Later he remarried somebody within 6 years of his age, and when you're 50 that isn't too bad. They've been together 6 years now.

 

[renebrrn]

I just wanted to have people's opinion about this, it won't affect anything I just want to see where everyone stands on an issue like this:

Is a relationship between two people with a 3 1/2 year difference in age at the ages of 16 and 19 something you yourself would look down on? Just based on that, mind you.

My husband and I met when I was 16 and he was 19. We have been married over 9 years.

 

[Wuhan_Clan]

See? I was wrong. It can work out. Simply because I didn't know that it worked out so often meant that I would be more likely to "frown upon" it.

 

[Technetium]

What state are you in, Smelly?

 

[MixedVariety]

My experience is that women mature before men most of the time. That means a 19 year old man and 16 year old jail-bait, I mean girl, are possibly about equal in maturity, which is to say they're both still immature as all hell and too dang young to have a truly meaningful relationship.
The other way around...19 year old woman, 16 year old studlet...doomed to failure.
But who says you shouldn't have fun trying?

 

[Anakha1]

Just from those numbers I see that one is legally and adult and one is not. A real relationship is possible no matter the age difference but they usually occur when both participants are relatively mature. By that I mean both are legally adults. I don't know the people involved but by numbers alone, I would say no, this is not a serious relationship.

It's not illegal in Canada, so I don't have a problem with it. If both participants are mature and the older one isn't taking the other's age and subsequent maturity level for granted, then it's no biggie.

 

[Steve_Kow]

My cousin is about to turn 20 and he's dating a girl who is barely above 16 (the age of consent in CT btw), in alot of ways she's still a kid while he has adult things to worry about. For example, any money that she makes she can spend on candy and clothes without a care in the world, while he has to worry about paying his car payment, insurance, and stuff like that.

There's also the problem of having to bring her home by 10 on a school night.

 

[Choogy]

Dunno, me and my gf are 2 yrs and 1 month apart...my parents are 2 yrs 1 month, but they were dating at 22 and 24, compared to 15 and 17 as it is now with me and my girlfriend...I say its up to the maturity of the people themselves, not age. Some people are really immature at older ages, and some people are mature. I think the only thing that bothers me is when you get the 80 yr old guys and 18 yr old gold-diggers

 

[Smelly]

Well, the 19 year old is not as mature as he should be, but he's been trying lately to get himself together. He busts his *** daily to provide for himself since he lives by himself. He finds jobs that keep him working in the morning, so he has as much time as possible to be with his girlfriend. His girlfriend on the other hand, goes to Highschool (of course), and he wouldn't want it any other way. He wants her to finish up Highschool, and then he would work on going to college with her, at whichever college she chooses, no matter what. He would do absolutely anything for her, but he considers himself... the lucky one.

 

[Steve_Kow]

^^Sounds like a quick way to cause a high school aged girl to lose interest.

 

[Underseer]

I dated a 23 year old through most of my 17th year, so I'd be a hypocrite if I criticized.

 

[Technetium]

Incidentally, I knew a kid in 6th grade... his natural mother was 30 and his natural dad was 60. He was 12 at the time. So his parents were at least screwing when his mom was 18 and his dad was 48. If not earlier, in all likelyhood.

If they can pull that off, then I'm sure you can pull off your situation.

 

[Smelly]

^^Sounds like a quick way to cause a high school aged girl to lose interest.

I don't know about that. He doesn't shower her with gifts (she doesn't like that), or spend an overly amount of money on her. Plus they had a talk as to where she wanted to be and what she wanted to do... and he said "Ok, then that's what we'll do." I don't think there is anything more satisfying to him than to see a smile on his girlfriend's face. Everyone is basically jealous of what they have, it's almost unnatural. If that scares off girls, then he is the bane on all that is woman! (or girl, in this case)

 

[th5418]

Incidentally, I knew a kid in 6th grade... his natural mother was 30 and his natural dad was 60. He was 12 at the time. So his parents were at least screwing when his mom was 18 and his dad was 48. If not earlier, in all likelyhood.

If they can pull that off, then I'm sure you can pull off your situation.

Can they still do it at 60 w/o any drugs?

 

[Anakha1]

Can they still do it at 60 w/o any drugs?

Uh... yeah. Men can get it up until they die. It might be harder, but it's still very possible. My old sexual psych proff. told me about a patient of hers that was upset because he was starting to have problems keeping up his sex three times per day schedule that he's had for the past 50 years... he was 86 years old.

 

[thejdawg2]

Is it possible that it will work? Sure.

However, were I your friend, I would tease you. My friend is 20 dating a 17 yr old. They started when he was 18 and she was 15. It was freakin messed up. They think they're going to last forever too... Personally, I don't think they are, but who knows.


My girlfriend is a shade under two years older than I. At first it was a bit of unease between us, as we are social people and dating me meant she couldn't go to the bars with her friends and to certain clubs either. We've quickly found that we enjoy each other's company though more than going out and getting wasted all the time.

That isn't to say that we won't go out as soon as I turn 21, but it means that we know our relationship has more to do with knowing each other than getting drunk and having a mutual good time, which is very easy to do.


If it's going well, don't let age restrict you. If you care for her, try to make it work. Besides, the older you two get, the less it matters about age. Good luck.