Blizzard Reveals Multiple New Products


Exciting news thus Sunday morning, as Blizzard has released news of several new products today. The biggest new offering is Blizz Kidzz, a line of educational software targeted at the youth demographic.

Games can be incredibly useful tools to teach players valuable skills and life lessons. To help young gamers take learning “to the max™,” we’re launching Blizzard Kidzz: a suite of educational games set in the Blizzard game universes. Blizzard Kidzz games will cover important subjects for gamers aged 6 and up, including mathematics, reading/writing, science, history, and more!

They’ve got several sample games displayed, including the live demo of a handy Zerg-themed typing tutorial. Hope your Z key is working! The only one so far with a Diablo theme is a geography tutorial that follows the madcap adventures and eventual torturous imprisonment hanging in a gibbet that awaits Deckard Cain.

Where In Sanctuary is Deckard Cain?
Oh no! Uncle Deckard got lost while compiling notes for the Book of Cain! Help Leah find her uncle by solving puzzles and collecting clues about the vast world of Sanctuary. (Rated M for Mature)

Other new products include Blizzard Novels for children, the Starcraft Supply Depot game for smart phones, and the Zergotachi B.net authenticator. Click through for more details on all these exciting new products.

April Fools!

Blizzard Entertainment is proud to announce a revolutionary new handheld title set in its award-winning StarCraft universe, StarCraft: Supply Depot! Read more about this epic gaming experience coming soon for iOS and Android devices, and play an exclusive demo of the game featuring the complete first mission!

Pushed to their limits, the beleaguered terrans plan a last-ditch attempt to save their people from extinction. They enter deep development on the most important research project of their time, one that will elevate warfare forever.

Check out the StarCraft: Supply Depot preview now!


New Zergotchi Authenticator – Blizzard Exclusive

Say goodbye to your dusty old Battle.net Authenticator and hello to its new incarnation: the Zergotchi! Blizzard Entertainment’s newest authentication system takes the next step in both virtual pet and Authenticator technology to provide you with the login experience of your life! The Zergotchi will not only be an endless source of fun but will also make sure your account stays as secure and safe as ever – in style. Feed it, play with it, care for it, and give it the love it needs to grow into the monster it was meant to be.

Features
• Adds an additional layer of security to your account
• Impressive 16-bit display
• Grows according to your play-style
• Intuitive, user-friendly interface

Check out this page to read more about the marvelous Zergotchi.

Tagged As: | Categories: Blue Posts, Humour, Merchandise

Comments

You're not logged in. Register or login to post a comment.
  1. they are announcing that diablo 3 was a huge april fools joke that they have been working on for 5 years, and arent releasing it ever

  2. Hahahaha… April fools… Ya got me Blizzard…
     
     
     
     
     
    If you haven’t noticed I’m being sarcastic.
     

  3. I bet they are announcing that the rune system was changed yet again. All seven unlockable runes are now scattered throughout the world, and one must collect them in order to summon a dragon that will grant the player invincible customization.

    • Also the progress of your adventure will be stored in a handheld style compendium called the RuneDexTM. Aside from runebased information the RuneDexTM also lists every human, animal, angel and hellspawn you encounter throughout your journey with helpful information, including but not limited to: size, weight, area found in, type, food preference as well as other must have knowhow.

    • I bet that once again, 90% of their jovial crap is about SC and WoW (if not Lost Vikings) with hardly a mention of Diablo to be seen.

      • That’s because the Diablo team has work to do, unlike the SC2 team that are just hanging out drinking beers.  True story and here is the pic to prove it.

        • To make it worse they’re drinking Stella Artois. Nasty hipster beer that tastes like ass. Although I do believe I see the top of a Newcastle bottle near the bottom of the picture, so that almost makes the drinking of Stella excusable. Almost.

  4. Why, oh why are u telling that this is a aprils fool joke?! 🙁  just let the people fall for it first :mrgreen:

  5. I guess I’d agree that its nothing huge, but I love their dig at ME3:

    Multiple endings, each influenced by your choices and color-coded for your convenience! (Further epic endings planned for post release as downloadable content.)

  6. Diablo 3 is on wiii is the other joke

  7. handheld SC game was funny as it took a jab at ME3

  8. Zergotchi Authenticator – do want.
     

  9. I think it’s great.
    Most of the people don’t fall for it anyways, so just make it really obvious but also really funny – I think it’s creative! 🙂

  10. http://us.blizzard.com/en-us/news/?d=2012-4#312334 this too. Fledgling Heroes: Blizzard Novels for a New Generation

  11. God I can’t believe they’re seriously coming out with kid products! All of Blizzard’s games that I know of are super violent and rated M for a reason! And Zergogotchi!? Really?! Who would want to cuddle and play with a baby zergling -_______-
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    …(happy 1st of the month everyone!)

  12. Nice try 🙂 You should’ve left out that it actually was April 1 in the news text, then you’d have gotten me… Until I read about the Neural Interface that is, LOL

  13. this too:

    http://tw.blizzard.com/zh-tw/games/bzfc/index.html

    Blizzard releasing Diablo and Warcraft on NES (that’s Nintendo Entertainment System for those of you that are too young to remember).

  14. “Lasts for months, and replacement is theoretically possible.”
     
    Hot damn!

  15. Holy fuck… I almost died laughing at one of the supply depot features: http://us.blizzard.com/en-us/games/supplydepot/
    “Multiple endings, each influenced by your choices and color-coded for your convenience! (Further epic endings planned for post release as downloadable content.)”
    Way to shoot down Mass Effect 3. But so freaking accurate. Well done on that one.

    • The dig at ME3 is the best. It put a smile on my face after the multicolored ending fiasco. Bioware could take a lesson or two from Blizz on taking your time to truly test and polish a game.

    • Tens of hundreds of thousands of unlockable hats!
       
      /rimshot

  16. I wouldnt mind playing that..

  17. …not that good this year

  18. Blizzard Kidzz: Get em hooked early.

  19. Is it wrong that I want the Zergotchi to be real?

    • I think a lot of people would have; hence it getting an actual entry in the bliz store. Sadly, sold out already.

  20. i understand why diablo iii is too late
     

  21. D3 for Wii and D3-Edition of the Wii-console are missing. Or aren’t they jokes 😉

  22. Guys… Battle.net Neural Interface is two years old 

  23. Supply Depot has about the same level of depth as D3, I wonder if it too took 4+ years to develop.

  24. Not a bad crop from Blizzard this year.  Unfortunately everyone is so primed for it over the last couple of years there’s less likelihood I second guess them any more. 

  25. Anyone ever play StarCraft by Blizzard?

Comments are closed.